Do you think the Church needs a spleen?
Posted By Christina M on November 8, 2006
Shannon, musing over her best bet for non-monetary tithing. In the end, she decided to babysit the tykes while I go to CCD this evening.
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I am hot...
it just comes in flashes.
Newsflash
Posted By Christina M on November 4, 2006
From my daughter:
“Guns don’t kill people. Dr. Tiller kills people.”
Mary, Martha, and Erma
Posted By Christina M on November 3, 2006
I’m convinced that Mary and Martha in the Bible must have had another sister; or if they didn’t, they should have. Erma.
Martha is the efficient one. Suzy Homemaker, if you will. She cleans, she cooks, and she probably chastises Mary for forgetting to bring her dishes to the sink. Then there’s Mary, the gauzy-eyed one. If she forgets to bring her dishes to the sink or feed the goldfish, it isn’t because she doesn’t care, but because she’s so absorbed in her love for Jesus that she forgets everything else. Her bathroom is very messy. Despite their differences, they are close. They love each other, and they complement each other. Even though Martha complains that Mary doesn’t help out enough in the kitchen, let’s face it: she doesn’t really care for Mary’s cooking anyway.
But they neglect to tell us about the third sister, who doesn’t sterilize or gaze. Maybe it’s because she’s too busy cracking jokes, and the other sisters figure it’s just as well if she’s out of the house when important company comes. She isn’t trendy, and she doesn’t wear her hominess with sunshine and grace. She’s a smart mouth, the kind that makes the family just a wee bit nervous.
Mary and Martha are probably just a little embarrassed by Erma. She makes fun of the Pharisees down the street for their silly little attitudes, and she tries to convince the Sadducees on the next block that there must be an afterlife, not through careful debate but by sarcasm. She shows up enthusiastically at the neighborhood parties, but instead of admiring all the women in this year’s fashions she laughs at them. She complains that her kids are sloppy about setting the Sabboth table, and anyone who has a conversation with her wonders if it will be the subject of an anecdote later. But mostly, people are just a bit annoyed by her witty criticisms.
This third sister isn’t homey and domestic, not in the way that Martha is. And with her penchant for talking and loud laughter, she could never be the quiet contemplative that Mary is. What neither Mary nor Marth realizes is that it isn’t really judgment that causes her to hone her tongue, but insecurity. She doesn’t help in the kitchen, not because she’s lazy but because she can’t seem to organize herself enough to get things done; and she doesn’t sit and learn from important company because, although she’d really like to, she is already way behind in washing the pottery. She doesn’t laugh because she thinks she is better than Mary or Martha; she laughs because she dares not cry.
Mary and Martha know their places, in the kitchen or in the front room. Erma is having a very long midlife crisis and doesn’t know where she belongs. So she’s thinking about starting a blog. Eventually, it had to come down to this.
Spam Zen
Posted By Christina M on October 30, 2006
aka The You’re-Scaring-Me meme.
My charming and patient husband has tagged me with a new meme, in which the goal is to choose filler material from a spam and wax philosophic. Or sophomoric. I’m not sure one can really tell the difference.
Do it, daddy-o, do it. Ive got the gilt.
At first glance, one might be tempted to envision a sock hop. This, I fear, is what they want us to think. The reality may be far more pernicious. Like all spy communications, this is of necessity in code. Far more than a call to dance, Daddy-o is being summoned to set in motion the chain of events that could threaten the stability of the free world, by toppling the most powerful economies of the west.
Daddy-o is clearly not some Clearasil wearing hepcat, but actually the leader of a plot to garner control of the world’s gold. Gilt? We are not talking here about sparkle, but actual gold bouillon. And Daddy-o, the one being notified that the plan is in place and ready to begin, is the head of an illegal international organization. Possibly the Mafia (with Daddy-o being, naturally, the Godfather), but more likely an Illuminati based cartel which heretofore has funded itself primarily with the sales of Nike shoes. Just do it, indeed.
The fact that the sender says “I’ve got the gilt” should worry us. This anonymous representative is saying that the plan is foolproof. The gold is as good as in hand. This is because, as the second use of the phrase “do it” tells us, both the first and the second phase are ready to be carried out. The plan is far advanced, and the free world is in danger.
You can learn a lot if you know how to read the cryptic emails that masquerade as spam in your inbox.
Your mission, if you choose to accept it, is this: find a phrase in your spam that seems to be nonsense, and tell us what it really means.
Every parent needs a little advice now and then.
Posted By Christina M on October 30, 2006
Homeschool Style
Posted By Christina M on October 24, 2006
What Type of Homeschooler Are You?
Mr. Potato Head You have your ideal of how things should look, but youre flexible enough to allow for change. You are not bothered by changing methods, mid-course if necessary. You use an eclectic combination of curriculum sources. Visit my blog: http://www.GuiltFreeHomeschooling.blogspot.com
Take this quiz!
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Booky Meme
Posted By Christina M on October 23, 2006
My Charming and Patient Husband tagged me with this book meme, so let’s go to the library!
1. One book that changed your life?
The Gospel of Matthew. I was at a crossroads, having been inactive in my faith for several years, and beginning to feel a little guilty about it. I was in an invalid marriage, and like so many who would rather make excuses than own up to what they’ve done, I began to question my faith instead of questioning my decisions. I began deciding that the Church was wrong about divorce, and from there, about a number of other things. Then I read Matthew. One by one, my convictions that other faiths had it more right than my own were shattered, as I saw Church teachings laid out in black and white by Jesus Himself.
2. One book you have read more than once?
The winner would have to be Jane Eyre, at 7 times. It was my first “grown up” novel, back in fifth grade, and it was like pulling teeth for my mom to talk me into getting past a difficult passage in the first chapter. But when I finished (late one night, past bedtime, in the light streaming in from the hallway), I cried: not for the story, but because it had ended.
3. One book you would want on a desert island?
A very, very long one? Ok, maybe one of the poetry volumes from the Harvard Classics, or the complete works of John of the Cross.
4. One book that made you laugh?
Planet Idiot by Lindsey Stokes. Suffice it to say that if Dave Barry had been a housewife…
5. One book that made you cry?
Besides Jane Eyre? Clan of the Cave Bear.
6. One book you wish had been written?
A final book in the Earth’s Children series that tells who Ayla’s people are. And without that nasty habit Ms. Auel has fallen into of stressing proof of research over story. And where she leaves out the sexual details.
7. One book you wish had never been written?
The Kinsey studies. Even though it’s now widely known to be fraudulent, people still quote and copy from it. Because of these made up studies, psychologists now feel justified in performing any manner of perversion, as long as it is in the name of research. I remember reading one psychology textbook that quoted extensively from Kinsey, and also went on to talk about infant orgasm research. Yes, infant. Now, the question of whether infants are capable of orgasm isn’t what matters… it is the fact that some adult felt justified in molesting a child too small to protest, and instead of jail time got publication.
8. One book you are currently reading?
The Well-Educated Mind, by Susan Wise Bauer. A very good book about how to study great literature and get a lot out of it.
9. One book you have been meaning to read?
A River Runs through it. I’ve seen the movie and loved it. It also influenced my ideas about education.
Tagged: GOP Soccer Mom, Happy Catholic, and Paragraph Farmer.
Note to Hypertot
Posted By Christina M on October 20, 2006
We do not have actual green eggs and ham in the house. You cannot have them for breakfast.
Note to Hypertot
Posted By Christina M on October 19, 2006
It’s pronounced “P B S,” not “B S”… although when Big Big World is on, I can understand the confusion.
Life’s Little Mysteries
Posted By Christina M on October 19, 2006
Being a mother, I’ve learned that not all the mysteries of life are religious. Having kids just fills life with those little mysteries you can’t explain. Like…
How does a baby figure out how to use words?
What makes a toddler insist on helping himself?
If a Dr. Seuss DVD loops, how many times in a row will a child watch it before getting tired of it?
How does a toy car end up under the burner?
The only conclusion I can reach is that by giving us children, the Lord makes us accept what we cannot understand about Him, when we realize that we can’t even solve the mysteries closer to home.