Posted By Christina M on June 7, 2013

Peace.

What peace?

Peace be with you.

Easier said than done. I can’t seem to make peace happen.

Peace is my gift to you.

I have no peace! I have no quiet! I have no rest! And trouble keeps coming.

One handful of peace and quiet is better than two handfuls of hard work and of trying to catch the wind.

That’s what I keep saying. I pray for peace all the time.

We hear cries of fear, cries of panic. Not cries of peace.

You know, Lord, that this is not a peaceful world. Where is this peace you keep talking about?

I’m leaving you my peace. I’m giving you my peace. I don’t give the kind of peace that the world gives. So don’t be troubled or cowardly.

So now I’m a coward if I’m troubled? Given the way things are, I’d be a fool to be at peace. Heroes cry in the street. Messengers for peace cry bitterly.

I will bring peace to your land. You will lie down with no one to scare you.

I am for peace; but when I speak, they are for war.

Blessed are those who make peace. They will be called God’s children.

First you say you give me peace, then you say make peace. How can it be both?

Make peace with God.

I’d like to. I long to. But it is so hard when the world seems out to get me.

Oppressed people will inherit the land and will enjoy unlimited peace.

Lord, you keep talking about peace. You make it sound important, for you seem to push for it constantly. Why?

Be in harmony and at peace with God.In this way you will have prosperity.

Maybe I’ve been looking at it the wrong way. I’ve been treating peace like a sacrifice you want me to make for you, but…

The mountains may move and the hills may shake, but my kindness will never depart from you. My promise of peace will never change.

Be at peace again, my soul, because the Lord has been good to you.

Your faith has saved you. Go in peace.

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Posted By Christina M on June 2, 2013

… or please forgive me if I engage in navel gazing.

I’ve been fairly quiet lately, and have probably bored away those few who followed Carmel Sundae. I would apologize for that, except that it may have been a favor, since I’m not sure I was accomplishing anything in the last year or two, anyway. But, unwilling to give up the blog, around the time of renewing my domain, I realized it was time to do some thinking and evaluating of what this space is meant to be. And I’ve come up with an answer: I’m not sure.

Kind of like my life.

Things I am sure of: I love my family. My husband is the most wonderful and supportive man in the world. My children are a delight and a genuinely full time interest. My vocation as a Carmelite Secular? God has made it clear to me that He wants me there; but there hasn’t been time to pursue it in the ways I’d expected, and I don’t “feel” like much of a Carmelite lately. Certainly not enough to wax brilliant on the subject. Maybe there’s my problem in a nutshell: my wish to wax brilliant, when what would be more useful and infinitely more honest would be to wax overwhelmed and occasionally confused.

The fact is that my life is never what I would have planned or expected. I planned a peaceful and proud life of raising easy, strong, impressive, and brilliant kids. The reality? Proud, yes; peaceful, no. Strong, impressive, and brilliant, yes; easy, NO. I never expected to have a house full of Autism, ADHD, auto-immune, depression, bipolar, anxiety disorders, developmental delays, Tourette’s, and OCD. I planned a career of teaching, not of answering the phone constantly when the school calls about my kids.

You know what they say about if you want to make God laugh. Make plans.

God made plans, and is probably laughing at my own simplistic plans that went in other directions. Truth be told, I am kind of honored that God put so much on my plate. I’m beginning to realize that just because I got a teaching credential doesn’t mean He intended me to teach (at least for now) in a public school. Just because He called me to be a Carmelite doesn’t mean He necessarily intended for my vocation to be about meetings. He gave me this oh-so-complicated life, and His gifts are to be treasured, even if we don’t understand them.

As I come to understand His will for my life, which includes parenting a noisy, sometimes disabled tribe maybe what He wants for this blog isn’t for me to share esoteric wisdom so much as to share my challenges so others may know they are not alone… and in the process I may find that I’m not alone either.

So please forgive me if I spend some time reaching into a grab bag trying to rediscover what my Carmel Sundae looks like. Please forgive me if it involves some self-examination, and yes, navel gazing.

And please do feel free to offer a prayer for me to know and do God’s will.

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Posted By Christina M on April 13, 2013

If Bible alone were sufficient, Joel Osteen and Ted Dekker would not have careers. We would never have heard of C. S. Lewis or John Bunyan. Martin Luther, John Calvin, and Jan Huss would not have had any reason to start new denominations, let alone branches that have different beliefs from one another. But all of these people were seeking tradition. New traditions, old traditions, different traditions, better traditions… whatever it was, it was more than the Bible they sought, a Bible they already had. And their followers differ because they follow differing traditions. Often the only things two different followers can agree on are the necessity of Christ and to accept one another’s differences.

Instead of asking whether tradition has a place, or even whether we follow a tradition, we should be asking where the dividing line is between traditions of God and traditions of man.

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Posted By Christina M on February 18, 2013

Jesus is not my homeboy.
He is my Lord, my Master, and my King.
He is my example and my better.
He is my Bread of Life.

Jesus is not my buddy.
He is my constant companion,
My shepherd, my guide.
He is my strength,
My rock,
My refuge.
He is my beloved, and He pastures me among the lilies.

My faith, my hope, my love,
Jesus is all virtue.
He is lovely and exalted.
He is mighty and worthy.
He reigns in glory.

Jesus is not my homeboy.
He is my way, and truth, and life.
He is my beginning and my end.
Holy, holy, holy is the Lord of Hosts.

He is.
I am unworthy to untie His sandals,
But His mercy endures forever.

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Posted By Christina M on January 28, 2013

1. There is no such thing as a “sugar sandwich.”
2. If there were, it would not be a breakfast food.

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Posted By Christina M on November 30, 2012

1. “Skip a few” is not a counting number.
2. Don’t hold the cat’s hind legs in the air while he eats.
3. Change your socks before someone comments on the odor..
4. Cats don’t like to wear hats.
5. It’s difficult to be accidentally rude when calling an adult “sir” or “ma’am.”
6. Cats don’t wear leashes, especially homemade leashes.
7. People don’t actually like it when you say mean things to them. They might get mad.
8. Cats do not play “hide and seek.” If he’s hiding, he probably does not want to be found.
9. Brushing your teeth makes you more popular.
10. You are not a blanket, and even if you were, cats don’t use blankets.

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Posted By Christina M on November 7, 2012

I’d love to point you to this article at Egregious Twaddle, about this article at HuffPo, and just say “Enough said,” but I can’t help myself.

The comment box says things like “I woke up this morning and didn’t find a republican in my vagina.” I take it not having a republican in her vagina is a good thing. The comment brigade seems quite happy, though, that they will have four more years of our money being placed there. My real question is what services will be provided in exchange for money in their g-strings. I know the standard service is an intimate dance; but since I’m not interested in that, may I have house cleaning service instead?

Also, do they provide their own pole, or do we have to pay for that, too?

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Posted By Christina M on October 15, 2012

1. A strong marriage requires sharing of values.

2. A happy marriage requires that each person consider him or herself responsible for the other one’s happiness.

Where do “interests” come in? Wherever you wish, so long as they don’t interfere with 1 and 2. A married person should never take on an “interest” that actively excludes the other person, because values and caring are always more important than interests. A relationship built around shared interests has a shaky foundation, but a relationship where outside interests supersede interest in one’s spouse has a splintered and painful foundation. Fortunately, a splintered foundation is reparable.

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Posted By Christina M on June 3, 2012

Several times in the past year or two I have read or heard someone talk about the “devastating” news that their child had autism. You know what? That kind of talk makes me mad. I mean, really mad.

Don’t get me wrong: I’m not entirely unsympathetic toward parents who face a difficult road. Having special needs kids myself, I know how rough it can be. If I were in the hospital after giving birth and learned that my newborn that I’d eagerly awaited had a condition that would limit his or her life, I would feel a lot of conflicting feelings. And yes, maybe one of them would be devastated. But autism is different.

You see, babies aren’t diagnosed with autism. By the time your child is diagnosed, you already know him. You have already had a chance to grow to love him. And putting a word, a name, a diagnosis, to the way he is doesn’t change a darn thing about what you already observed in him. It doesn’t mean that the child you thought was going to be easy will suddenly be hard. It doesn’t mean that the child you communicated with will suddenly stop communicating. It simply means that the kid you already knew you had is the kid you have, and that the reasons for the way he is have a name.

Are you going to suddenly stop loving him because of a diagnosis?

If anything, a diagnosis should be a relief. He isn’t throwing fits because he’s undisciplined; it’s sensory issues, or frustration over not being able to communicate. He isn’t making noises to mock you, he is expressing a tic. And he isn’t difficult because he is hopeless; rather, because you now have a name for his condition, you now have hope for help. You can now begin learning what his special needs are, so that you can meet them.

In this society of designer genes, I think some people think there is something shameful in having a child who has some imperfection. But the reality is that God doesn’t give us what we can’t handle, and if you have a child with a special need, God is expressing his incredible trust in you by giving you this unique and blessed calling. Besides, there is no such thing as a perfect child. At least, not by the designer standard. If those who don’t “meet up” to such high expectations are a disappointment, a mistake, maybe you should ask yourself if you are, yourself, a mistake. Because you aren’t “perfect” either.

And that’s a good thing. We have a God who designed us the way we are, so that He could show His love for us. A God who died for us, even while knowing our flaws. If He can die for each of us, even while knowing that some will reject the gift, I think we can love our own children, surprises and all, without demanding or expecting superficial perfection.

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Posted By Christina M on November 22, 2011

1. If people are outraged about CEO salaries, why did they not protest in the streets when Obama, after promising an economic stimulus package, gave all the money to CEOs?
2. We have a man in the white house who makes fun of learning-disabled people. He is comfortable with the killing and disposal of inconvenient people, including the ill, the elderly, and the unwanted newborn. His wife makes fun of fat people. Yet President Obama is considered a symbol of Tolerance.
3. Following on that, people continue to look to President Obama and his party (which is, to be fair, quite tolerant of the Obamas and their bigotries) to cure inequalities. They continue to trust that in the name of all that is good, kind, and fair, the Obamas will bring about a new era of Tolerance.
4. Euthanasia, the movement to eliminate the costly or inconvenient, is lauded as an act of love, mercy, and Tolerance.
5. Republicans, who oppose targeting groups for extinction, are called Intolerant and labeled Bigots.

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