Urgent Prayer Request
Posted By Christina M on December 26, 2010
Please offer emergency prayers for baby Marcus. He’s hospitalized with RSV and getting worse.
Site Meter
I am hot...
it just comes in flashes.
Note to Hyperlad
Posted By Christina M on December 22, 2010
Directv and Directory Assistance are not the same thing. You cannot add services to Directv by calling Directory Assistance. Even if you called Directv, they would not let you add services. And, by the way, calling Directory Assistance costs $1.25. Every. Single. Time.
A Time to Heal
Posted By Christina M on November 28, 2010
One of the hardest things for a child to get over is when their God image hurts them. We all have images of God… the father or mother who represents goodness to us; the aunt or uncle who teaches us about God and seems like His voice to us; the authority figure, the early figure of love, and so on. In a sacramental sense, these people who give us a face to attach to God help us, as young people, to see the unseen.
But they are fallible. Sometimes these faces that we think of as representing God hurt us. A parent, a pastor, or a neighbor who seems to be God’s presence in our life will eventually let us down because he or she is not perfect; and if that person lets us down in a big way, it may not only feel like we can never forgive and heal, but it may feel like it was God Himself who hurt us.
But it isn’t.
The person who harmed you wasn’t God. God was the one holding you, rocking you, consoling you, and hurting with you. The person who looked the other way while you were being hurt wasn’t God. God was the one whispering in that person’s ear “Have courage, my child. Tell the secret. Help the victim. Do what you have to do.”
And you hurt because the person who hurt you didn’t stop, and the person who knew didn’t find that courage. And you blame God, because that person who loved you, and knew you were being hurt didn’t love you enough to do anything about it. And if they love you and don’t love you enough to help you not to be hurt, you reason, God also must not love you enough. So you turn your back on Him.
If God’s rules, and God’s representatives, don’t do the job, then you’ll create your own god, who will serve your needs. You’ll redesign God in the image of how things should have gone.
The problem is you aren’t really redesigning God; you are only re-imagining those humans you thought represented Him. You are picturing what they should have been like, and how they should have behaved. And when you attach that picture of the people who harmed you to God, you reject the very one who does love you enough to help you.
He loves you. And He only wants what is good for you. It was not his will that you got hurt. It was his great pain. He loves you so much, all he wants to do is help you and heal you; but when you run away from Him, you reject that healing.
I understand why you find it hard to trust Him. And He certainly understands. That is why He is still waiting, with open arms, to comfort you. Pour out your pain and let Him.
Vocabulary lesson
Posted By Christina M on November 20, 2010
I think one of the biggest sources of unhappiness in the world is that we don’t know what happiness is. I think that, in order to be happy, we must know what happiness isn’t.
Pleasure isn’t happiness. Pleasure may be fun, may be enjoyable, and may even at times come with fulfilling results. But it also may not. Pleasure is the nice — pleasant — feeling we get from things we enjoy, like backrubs, compliments, or ice cream. There is nothing inherently wrong with pleasure, but there is also nothing inherently right about it. Some forms of pleasure may be harmful, and some forms of pleasure may be immoral. Just because something feels good does not mean it is a form of happiness. A person who takes a pleasure-inducing drug, or receives a really great Christmas present may well experience pleasure while receiving no happiness at all; because happiness comes from within. If pleasure were the same as happiness, there would be no suicide as long as ice cream is around.
Gratification isn’t happiness. Gratification is getting what we want. Sometimes what we get is pleasure. Sometimes it is the fulfillment of a goal or other more esoteric desire. It can be power, or hedonism, or a lack of want. But it does not lead to growth. When we do not grow we stagnate, and too much gratification without effort or self-discipline can lead to stagnation. Getting what you want isn’t necessarily bad, but it isn’t happiness. Even if we get that nice, warm feeling of pleasure with it.
Success isn’t happiness. Convenience isn’t happiness. Luck isn’t happiness. All sorts of people who have all of these things still go to bed sad, depressed, or even suicidal. Because not only are they not happiness, but they are also not things that can cause happiness.
The reason is that happiness is internal, and all of these other things are external. Happiness — true happiness — is joy. It is something much deeper than a feeling of knowing you can get what you want. The old saying says “Happiness isn’t getting what you like, but liking what you get.” Attitude is where happiness is born, not circumstance.
Simplify Laundry
Posted By Christina M on August 26, 2010
It was both a relief and a frustrating when I heard someone refer to a spot in their home as “Laundry Mountain.” A relief to know that someone else has the same term, and that I am not alone in the struggle; but a definite frustration to think that this struggle may be truly universal. Will I ever catch up?
Well, today I don’t have some magic cure for shrinking the mountain; but I do have a small tip to help keep future laundry a little more manageable. The three hamper system. Each room (at least those belonging to people old enough to do laundry) gets three hampers. Sounds like a lot, right? Sounds like a space hog. But it isn’t, if the three hampers nest. Stack the three hampers nested one in another in another, and use the top hamper as your laundry hamper. When it gets full, you separate the three hampers, and choose a color to wash. White? Ok. Put all the whites into one empty hamper and everything else into the other. Presto, you have a single load sorted and ready to wash, and the whole load gets put away in one room, so it is easier to put away as well. When you’re done, you have one hamper with your other clothes, one empty, and one just emptied when you washed. You nest them again, and they’re back to taking up the space of a single hamper.
The Price of Trash
Posted By Christina M on August 25, 2010
I was reading an article in an old issue of Readers Digest (July 1995) called “The Recycling Myth.” The article asserted that the shortage of landfill space is a myth, and that recycling is more expensive than dumping. Both the cost and the space need are improved by newer methods of landfill management, specifically piling higher and covering layers with dirt, rather than burying shallow landfills. While I have no reason to doubt either assertion, I think that it neglects addressing some of the more important reasons for recycling.
Money and landfill space are certainly considerations, but in some ways these issues may be mere distractions from more important considerations. The cost to the earth and the cost to human life must be considered beyond the value of financial resource, because they are more important. The ecological questions must be addressed in far greater depth than the amount of land used, and the safety and health issues must me addressed in a meaningful way.
The land used argument sounds valid until you consider that even if less “land space” is used, it is the same amount of garbage being put into the earth. And no matter how careful authorities are, some toxins will find their way into the dump. The less space a dump takes, the better. Two cubic yards are the same volume whether they are stacked or laid side by side. And while they may not have the same effect financially, in terms of land cost, they have identical effect in the amount of earth harmed. Therefore, minimizing the amount of waste buried in landfills is important. It’s a red herring to bring in the amount of land purchased and used. That is not a measure of volume of earth tainted, it is only a financial gauge.
More important, though, is the impact of mining. This point has rarely been addressed in the question of recycling, and I believe it should be. Mining hurts, and kills, people, and the more metals we throw into landfills, the more we later need to have mined. Even as I type this Chilean miners in a recent disaster are awaiting rescue. A few months ago, 29 miners were killed in a collapse in West Virginia. Almost every year stories hit the news about accidents killing and endangering miners. Recycling is a far safer job than mining. I would far rather create recycling jobs than mining jobs, even if it is more expensive.
Ecologically, too, mining pays a dear and irreversible cost. The more we use the resources that are easily available and dispose of them, the more need to be mined. And the more we deplete those resources, the more “innovative” the mining techniques need to become. By innovative, I mean that mining companies need to resort to ever more ecologically invasive methods. They harm the earth, and they often kill communities economically and destroy the lands on which people live. Often the victims are among the poorest people on earth, and then what little they have is destroyed when they no longer have drinking water or a clean place for their children to play. When we say that it costs less to dump than to recycle, we need to ask the question: costs whom less?
I realize I’m responding to a 15 year old article; yet my own community only just adopted a widespread recycling program this summer. It really is taking us this long to take action, and every month we wait is another month that raw goods need to be mined instead of recycled. This isn’t just about money, and it isn’t just about politics. It is about those who suffer as a result of the inconvenience of separating cans from garbage.
What I ask of you as you read this is one thing: do not look to the hypocrites who yell “save the earth” while running up $1000 a month electric bills. Do not look at the earth as belonging to one political party. Do not view recycling as something extremists are trying to push down your throat. Instead, just take a moment to think about those who have seen their communities destroyed, or their fathers lost, to mining. If you reject all other environmental efforts because the messengers sometimes offend, please do not reject recycling your cans.
Are You Ready for a Credit Card?
Posted By Christina M on August 20, 2010
The lure of buying without paying can be heady. But not everyone is cut out for a credit card. Take this simple quiz to see if you are one of the few who is.
- Are you willing to pay $700 for a $300 vacation?
- Do you feel good about being beholden to people who despise you, over a long period of time?
- Do you feel that it’s right and fair that accounts get sold to people you never contracted to do business with?
- Are 8 AM threatening calls exciting to you?
- Would you rather have a $100 mp3 player now instead of a $400 iPod in six months?
- Do you have trouble staying awake to worry in the middle of the night?
- Do you relish the thought of living month to month and shifting money from account to account to survive?
- Do you think having a savings or an emergency fund is for wusses?
- Does stress give you a rush?
- Are cheap gadgets and meals out more important than your kids’ college education?
If you answered yes to more than half of these questions, congratulations! You are truly cut out for a life of living on the edge with credit cards.
Note to Curtain Climber
Posted By Christina M on August 4, 2010
“Buh-nandoop” is not a generally accepted replacement for the word “banana.”
And while we’re at it, “dee doop” is not another way of saying “thank you”. “Mdup” does not mean “milk,” and even if you said “soda” instead of “dodup” I probably wouldn’t give you any.
You’re cute, kid. Very cute. But I gotta say, you’d still be cute if you learned to talk in real words.
Don’t Tell Me There’s Nothing to Tell
Posted By Christina M on August 2, 2010
Cooties Alert: men, if you’re squeamish, you might want to look away. This is pure woman stuff.
I bought the book because its title was clever, but also because it echoed what I keep saying: Is it hot in here? Or is it me? Subtitled The Complete Guide to Menopause, it seemed like the right book to have in my house. I promptly put it neatly in a bookcase and forgot about it. That is, until today. After a crazy 6-week cycle and wondering if I was pregnant, to be followed by a surprise visit from Aunt Flo and a hot flash that nearly had me passing out at Wal-Mart, the book caught my eye this afternoon, and it was time to start reading it.
I’m not very far into it, but I like what I’m seeing so far. The authors say, in the introduction, “We went to our local bookstores looking for a guide to this confusing new phase of our lives, but everything we scanned seemed to be either about one woman’s experience or a testament to one expert’s opinion. We wanted a balanced, scientific, and comprehensive view, the menopausal equivalent of What to Expect when You’re Expecting.” When I read this, I was hooked. Suddenly I remembered the last book I’d picked up on the subject, and why I had put it back down. Most of it focused on two points: “Menopause is a healthy phase, so take your hormones and get on with it!” and “You should just be happy that your kids have moved out and now you can start a new career.”
Well, I’m not necessarily convinced about the hormones, and my youngest child is 2 years old; so neither of these points really hit home with me. That author, who did have reasonable qualifications, was writing about a “universal” experience by using her own preconceived notions as the sole anecdotal directive. I am not 50, I am 43. I do not have 2.2 kids, I have 8. I am both an old mother and a young mother, and I needed something a bit more inclusive if it was going to be relevant to me. I wanted less advice about hormones and careers, and more solid information about what to expect when I’m expecting hot flashes.
I can’t tell you a whole lot about this book at this point, but I am glad that the authors are seeking to do something differently from the book that I tried to read before. And I am always glad when one more book on the subject is written, because it is today’s dark subject. There was a time when mothers were reluctant to tell their daughters about s-e-x. It was too uncomfortable a topic, I guess. Now, people treat menopause that way. Mothers who didn’t go through it the traditional way (maybe they had a hysterectomy or some medical condition) are hard pressed to tell their daughters what to expect. Some daughters don’t have access to their mothers, and don’t have older sisters to ask. And some just never get around to the conversation. It’s still too uncomfortable. But we need to talk. We women deserve to know what is happening to us, and what is going to happen, and how long it might take.
We have questions! How do we tell the difference symptomatically between a perimenopausal missed cycle and a missed cycle due to pregnancy? What are the odds of becoming pregnant at this time in our lives? Are there tests that can tell us where in this process we are? And so on.
There are also personal questions we should be asking. If we have mothers or older sisters available, we need to learn to be less shy about it. Your assignment, ladies, is this. If you have already been through it, please talk to your daughters or granddaughters about it. Tell them what it was like, and don’t be afraid to answer messy questions. Information from a relative may be more helpful than information from a stranger, because some patterns are genetic. If you haven’t been through it, ask. You will go through it, so be prepared with information ahead of time.
Women need to get over their fear of discussing these “private things.” It happens to 50% of the population… how private can it be? We need to know that, like pregnancy, breast cancer, and s-e-x, this is something we have a right to know about.
A Useful Utility
Posted By Christina M on July 29, 2010
The office where I get my dental work done has a typo on their web page. It is in the phone number, and every time I try to call I first try the number listed, in case it has been corrected. It hasn’t. Today I solved this on a personal level, with Notezilla. Notezilla has a unique feature that I haven’t seen on any other sticky notes application: you can pin a note to a particular window. That includes an application window, or even a web page. It goes by the title of the window itself, so as long as the web page has a name listed in the title bar that is unique, or at least does not duplicate the name of another page you frequent, it works beautifully. In this case, I made a tiny note with the correct phone number, placed it right on top of the wrong phone number, and set it to open every time that web page opens.
Notezilla has a lot of other features, but the pin to window feature is my favorite. For a complete list, I suggest you click on the link above and check it out. If you want sticky notes on your computer, Notezilla may be exactly what you didn’t even realize you were looking for.